Im still not yet over the news of me getting into a physics class instead of a bio class . Im indeed glad that i've great classmates unlike the other classes where theres many trouble-makers inside .However , the thought of not being able to get into the courses i want just seriously ruined my mood. I know physics is easy to study with formulas but not to forget i sucks in maths so how m i going to excel in physics when my maths sucks to the core ?

Someone told me something very realistic , im not angry with her but i think she is right . Only when you're in one of the top students catergory then you'll have the privilege to go into any classes you want. I think no one is to blame but myself to waste bloody 2yrs of my secondary schl life , serve me right . So im left with no choice but just study hard . Yes , im doubting myself , i doubt if i can do it . Ever since i stepped into secondary schl life i've been hating physics, in fact i've NEVER intend to take physics .So now, can u imagine im going to sit for GCE O'LEVEL combined chem / PHYSICS paper in JUST 2more years ? i cant man . Is like a fear . If i dont score well , i cant get into a poly i'll be so dead . I dont think im going to reveal why i said that here but well im just indifferent from any friends of mine . 1 very obvious difference which is , im a malaysian BUT not a P.R.

I think back alot of things in th past recently , i think i've been sucha fool.However i know is just parts and parcels of life .Everyone do make mistake isnt it ?
 i hope , i pray , i wish . 
Everything lies with my own hands now , to destroy myself totally or to rebuild myself .

a note to myself :

I've

no choice but to study double/thriple hard for physics than anyone else.

If only biomedical courses dont requires bio but thats totally craps cuz is stated as BIO-medical , so i've no choice but to see how things goes &just study hard for now . damn it man.